Ethan Parker

AHHHAHAHHAHAHH the days of beloved Jetta are coming to a close!!! As I type this the eBay auction has 2 hours left. This car has been an integral part of my life for these reasons:

# 1 It brought my Dad and I back from my mission. It was lovingly given to my by my 2nd cousin who lives in Valencia, CA. They drove it to Ventura where the mission home was and we drove it back to Kaysville, UT.

# 2 It was purchased by my great uncle in Cedar City, UT brand new in 1986 and has been owned by family members ever since.

# 3 This is the first car I’ve ever owned and also my first vanity plate: “PLAN IT”. I get a lot of laughs and compliments about that. I figure it’s motvation to succeed with ma business.

# 4 This is also the car I gave my first ride to Janie Thompson in. I can end a sentence with a preposition if I want to. Lotsa memories, lotsa memories.

# 5 The Jetta has prevented me from marrying a gold digger. I go to pick girls up and they have to love me for who I am

# 6 I took it on a 3,000 mile road trip in the summer of 2007 that completely rocked. It was Provo to Phoenix (sister) to LA to Santa Barbara and Santa Maria (mission) to Sacramento, CA (cousin) to Portland (grandparents) to Jerome, ID (mission buddy with many moo tows) to Kaysville, UT (parents). I found out on this trip that a) I’m kind of crazy in a car by myself as evidenced by the crazy videos I took b) the car can do 515 miles on one tank of diesel and c) I ain’t afraid of road trips and doing what I feel would be fun/good.

# 7 Some value other people’s possessions very highly as evidenced by the $2,225 price right now on eBay. It’s still got 1 hr 50 mins at this point. Kelly Blue book is $750.

Here’s the little you tube video I took to help sell it:

I just looked down at my glasses and saw the words “lucky” on the inside of the frames. Looks like the brand of my eye glasses reminded me that I’m lucky to have my dad.

It’s Father’s day today. I’m at church but this is kind of like my journal, so Wordpress for iPhone, I thank you. I’m sitting by a friend who lost her dad a few years ago to cancer so my heart goes out to her today especially when all the songs and talks are about fathers.

My dad totally rocks. We had tons of fun growing up. We made up this game called Parker Ball where you hit a soccer ball with baseball bats into opposing goals, sort of like polo without horses. We also went camping quite a bit with church folk. My dad was always at our sports games, too. I can’t think of a football, baseball, or soccer game I played in growing up that he didn’t attend. He always volunteered us to do stuff at church, too. We forever moved people and helped out.

I wrote a song for my dad 2 years ago for Father’s Day but never recorded it. I still have the lyrics and remember the song, though, so I’m going to put it on YouTube here when I get home.

Happy Father’s Day!

Especially for Youth has been something amazing for me. I value the past week’s experiences over almost any program in which I’ve ever participated. This post is for my kids. I love them so much, all 24 of them. They are so bright and happy, I could just hang out with them and teach them all the time. I said I’d post the pictures and videos we took from EFY so here we go! The full album is on facebook, this will be a summary.

First, this video is for those who know anything about “sauce”. Yes, you know what I’m talking about.

Yeeeeuh. It’s funny that my hip hop side (if I even have one, man I find it VERY entertaining that I taught the kids how to break dance and rap, yeah I’m so hood ) came out this week. I do like some hip hop music and used to listen to a rap-rock band named Rage Against the Machine a lot. Those roots do go all the way back to high school, I suppose. And Phoenix is pretty gangster.

Here’s us rapping on the last day.

I think my favorite part about EFY last week was how much we all cared for each other. Lots of love in that group.

Pardon the infrequent posts, I’m a twitter junkie these days, so I’ll add couple pics from little blue bird land.

It’s that time of year, folks. Candy, candy, and more candy time! Eric and I went to the eSmifs last night in search of Easter joy only to find this!! AHhhhhhhahahahhAHHHhaAAAHhAAaaaaAa.

I know. How could this happen? Where are the Cadbury eggs? The big and little ones? That one kind with a matte-finish shell and solid chocolate goodness inside!? WHERE? We still managed to find some starburst jelly beans, peeps, and a twix, but man I really wanna Easter fun. Looks like it’s off to Walmart later this week for some bonus discounted Easter treats.

Today my beloved BYU 106th ward becomes the Young Single Adult 130th ward. The Church made a change recently that affects student wards in that they will no longer be student wards but YSA wards. I just got called to be the membership clerk so it’s back to getting to know everyone in the ward and stalking them a good one. A year and a half at executive secretary got me pretty up to speed with my ward friends. I just love talking to people, meeting them, and hearing about their passions and what makes them tick.

Eric and I put some more stuff in the crock pot today. I love that thing! Bless crock pots and rice cookers! You can’t screw it up!

I just got off the phone with my older brother, he’s awesome. He’s very mechanically inclined and likes to buy wrecked vehicles for cheap, fix them, and sell them. Right now he’s got an ‘09 Yamaha R6, a Ducati 1198S, an ‘02 Corvette Z06, a Tundra with a 6″ lift, an ‘05 545i with a V8 and a 6 speed. Man that’s some seriously fast and sweet stuff. I went down there not too long ago and got to ride the R6 a tiny bit. Man new motorcycles are just fabulous. They start, go, stop, and look soooo well. Yes, they look well.

Here’s a video of the Tundra playing in the Sand. This was so FUN!!

This post is a little on the -may offend people- side but it’s from the heart. Remember that organizations people start are sort of like their children.

“I’m so glad you’re you, but you should really be more like me.”

This is something we all do. We thinly congratulate others of their hard-earned success only to give them a sharp left hook to the jaw of how they could enjoy so much more happiness if they had just done things a little more like we would have, if given their same opportunities.

I forgive others of the crime because I do it myself, but it’s a pretty egotistical way of communicating any way you slice it. But hey, we’re all a little egotistical

Blessed and rare is the soul that can talk to someone without offering advice. It’s nearly impossible to do. Try it, I dare you.

I’m an entrepreneur; not the drop-out-of-school-all-guts-raging-success-or-death type, more the kind that gets a college degree from a good school while running a business as a student. The mostly-guts type that will give it a boy-scout try before assuming that succeeding with your own business is for the lucky or evil.

So because most people have not heard of Parker Planners but they have heard of BYU’s accounting program, it is everyone’s job to tell me that my business is “nice” but I should really use that accounting degree for something useful. Thanks everyone, but next time I want to silence my faith and crush my own dreams I’ll go read despair.com posters until I start to believe them.

Love,

Ethan

This weekend has been amazing! So Thursday we loaded up the trucks, B-mer and Vibe and headed for the hills just outside Hurricane, UT. It’s pronounced “Her-ih-cun” said really fast if you’re from around here. We went to a place I’ve been many times with my dad and brothers to shoot guns and what not when I was a kid. My grandma has lived down here since the early 80’s and many a vacation day has been spent exploring southern Utah’s red rocks.

This trip we had my dad’s go-kart with us which was perfectly suited to the terrain. Way fun, and the best part is you can take a passenger along for the ride, too; this time it was a niece or nephew saying “go crazy!” or ” no jumps this time”. We also shot some guns and oddly enough there were hundreds of little tiny frogs all over the ground to entertain everyone.

Enjoy the documentation:

We went to a demolition derby Saturday night and it was they best one I’ve been to! Oh man you wouldn’t believe it! Normally they do cars, old weird cars with no traction and there’s a few bumps, but nothing spectacular. Ever seen demo-derby trucks!?! Yup, they got ‘em at the Washington County Fair! Oh yeah. We saw one get nailed from the side and flip over. So sweet.

Enjoy this demolition derby worker:

Discovery of the day: rearrange St. George and you get George Street! 

I’m here right now with all my immediate family! There are 8 original Parkers, 3 spouses, and 9.7 grandkids. We are having such a blast. My neice Sienna who is 9 is an amazing dancer, if she goes to BYU she’s cougarette material all the way. I beat box and she grooves to it

We all got here tonight and we’re all staying at this sweet house. It was built in 1870 but has been added onto and rennovated since then. Lotsa bedrooms, pool, hot tub, tennis court, wifi, flatscreen tv and dvd player- what else do you need?! This place is awesome and no better people to be here with! Really looking forward to these next few days!

On June 26th that is. The event that inspired the blog has reoccurred today! It’s only 10:38 am and my birthday has been way good! It started off with learning more about the word “wrest”. Do you know what it means? It means to force to twist something. I for some reason thought it meant to neglect. So if you’re reading a good book from a good author, don’t wrest their words, or twist them to mean what you want, because that ain’t not no good.

THEN I put some new tires on my car! They look great, feel great, and now my car doesn’t pull to the right anymore! Oh yes. Next it was off to Sport Clips for a haircut and shampoo by someone else. Shampooing your hair isn’t hard, but man it’s great when someone else will do it for you.

I have some funs to look forward to! I’ll write more when they happen.

Ok they happened.  A buddy of mine wrote me a birthday song! It was played on a guitar and sang with a voice to the tune of  “don’t worry, be happy” but instead the song said “Ethan Parker . . . it’s your birthday!” Loved it. 

Now it’s training time for our new sales intern Nate. He rocks, very smart guy. Then two other wardies and I practiced for a musical number we’re doing on Sunday It’s an octet, 4 guys 4 gals. Sounding pretty good! All in the area are welcome to come. It’s in the SWKT at 9am.

Now it’s Eric time. My younger brother is the coolest ever! He took me to lunch/dinner at Nicoitalia Pizza. If you’ve never been it’s like pizza heaven on earth. Even the owner is from Boston and has a sweet accent! That was some good grub. You have to try their cannoli’s. Really. You have to. My beloved brother then took me to see Karate Kid. Very cool movie, I really liked it a lot.

That makes a pretty good birthday right? I thought so but there was more! We came back to the apartment and it was full of people wanting to surprise me on my birthday! They surprised me and we ate food and grooved to groovy melodies. Then volleyball and then Eric and I watched the end of  The Wedding Singer. Very good birthday indeed!

Thanks for tuning in.

Love,
Ethan

My neighbor has a missionary in the MTC. He made what is probably the coolest valentine ever for her. Here’s Eric and I celebrating his self-discovery and success. He’s going to fold it up and put it in a box. Wow.

I have been protesting Facebook for some 3.5 years now. I thought it was a big waste of time because so many do just that.

I have decided that I’m going to be in the world and try  not to be of it. Because my father, grandmother, bishop, and Church now have facebook pages I figure it’s finally time.

Yes, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has a facebook page; it has  177,416 fans.

My bro Eric turn-ed 22. Wow, that’s an old brother. I threw him a “supplies” party, it was great. I took him to see Invictus (sweet inspiring quotes but wayyy too long) the night before his B-day and we had a party that started at midnight! I had everyone get prepared with office supplies and they all said “supplies!!” when we walked through the door and turned on the light. Ha ha.

I also got him an icecream cake but we didn’t bust that out until everyone left (those things are expensive!). I wrote “Suppliz Eric” and it was good stuff. Here is me writing on the cake and then Eric and I after the party.

That’s a practice.

Happy Birthday!

My Grandma lives in Hurricane, UT and we gathered there to spend time and give thanks together.

Here’s a pic of us posing in the desert with our guns. Shooting has always been a part of my life since I was small.

It was so fun to go shooting with my brothers and my dad. Ammon is heading back to Afghanistan Monday so this is especially cool to see him. He’s the super ripped one.

This is a manual clay pigeon thrower. We had a contest to see who could throw the farthest.

We don’t just shoot guns, though. We Parker Boys can stuff a turkey!

We can eat one, too. That’s grandma & gramps to the left. Mom to the right.

And shop the day after. I got a sweet sweater. That’s a free mini pumpkin pie in my paw.

Ammon and I the day he flew in. He had been on airplanes and in airports for about 52 hours. He got to see Dubai and lots of other places on the way back. Good to see him, he’s huge now, too! The guy can bench like 320 and squat something like 450lbs. At least one of us is using that superb genetic material.

Here we are before the big night. It took a few hours to find all the pieces to the costumes, but way worth it. We went to a big party out in nowhere-ville (Wallsburg) Utah and people were dancing it up in a big barn thing.

We carved pumpkins for what the LDS culture calls “Family Home Evening” in my singles ward (when you’re all singles they call it ‘home evening’). It was pretty fun stuff, I got to take out the guts of a pumpkin with my hand, which was really satisfying.

Here is a hat you don’t see every day. We got it for her birthday along with a pound of fudge from the BYU Bookstore. Mmmmmm. My mom has degrees from both schools! You’ll never guess how old she is, lookin’ good, mom!

They took us to a sweet Thai Restaurant called “Thaifoon” and it was yummy, even days after. At the restaurant I ate a super hot pepper that caused me to respect peppers a little more. I drank like a gallon and a half of water. Gateway Mall is really nice.

It is July 3rd and time for Lagoon.

Eric and mom in the parking lot at Lagoon. Pretty good stuff. We should be able to find the car as long as no one else comes.

This is Eric and I before riding Wicked for the first time. it’s the coolest coaster at Lagoon. I’m pre-scared here.

This is a video of us riding Wicked the coaster. It was wicked cool. Who says you lose your camera while riding a sweet rideo? Me: 1 Lagoon: 0

The Wicked Coaster Known As Wicked.

Wicked analysis from Ethan Parker on Vimeo.

Wicked at Lagoon

This is a video of The one they call the fire dragon ride. Yup, upside down and camera+lunch still in tact. Me: 2 Lagoon: 0

Oh yeah

Love it when babies eat dirt.

Eric in the dragster thing – its $12 extra to do it three times. Pretty fun stuff, can’t believe Eric won. Thing must have been rigged. Me :2 Eric/Lagoon: 1

Drag Lagoon from Ethan Parker on Vimeo.

Drive

The dragster track from 1st person view.

Le Bumper Cars

Riding the bumper cars. Eric and I’s goal was to create maximum violence through a full speed head-on collision. I’m right, though. He can’t win this time . . . because its not a race.

Turns out they used Michael Jackson (allegedly) for the model of this ghost scary thing. Allegations may or may not have been from Eric.

Terroride! from Ethan Parker on Vimeo.

That’s the right way to say it.

Mystical fountain ball that you can move around . . . sweet.

So sweet it must be ridden! They told me I couldn’t ride it anymore. However, that was after a harty time with me and the mystical fountain ball. Me: 3 Lagoon: 1 Still  came out on top.

This is near Strawberry Reservior in Heber, Utah. A beaufitul place and perfect site for tarp cover construction and tent placement.

We were here two years ago and started to make a cabin. Here are the remnants. This was built by effort, creativity, blood, sweat, and two very dull hatchets!

Mmmmm, camping bacon . . .

. . . Copper wanna Bacon!

Ammon the chef says no. A great cook for humans is he.

The three Parker Brothers reunited at last! What better place to be than in nature with family, food, animals, and weapons?

Anything is better roasted. Yep, that’s a twinkie.

The mighty annual caber toss event. This is Ammon heaving the large log as far as possible.

Eric fears not the caber.

Ethan and his caber heave.

Ammon hiking up the glacier that is our snow fun. It’s cool because there’s only snow where you want it to be – away from the campsite but close enough to go slide on!

Sure is beautiful out there.

Eric le Lumberjack ho!

Gotta go to sleep! It’s 2:43 am as I write this. I hope you enjoyed this tour of the annual Father-Son campout 2009.

This was one good cake. Be aware, be aware. Even said my name.

This is Ethan and Eric just after the midnight ice cream cake explosion suprise. It was fantastic. He got a cake from Baskin Robbins and we ate it good at around 12:30 at night. There was a small crowd of singing friends outside. I even got a kiss on the cheek from a stranger! (attractive, young, and female, don’t worry) I’m almost 24 at this point. 2:30pm and its official. Eric is getting his best ninja turtle smile on.

I woke up to the smell of bacon and we had a great meal. Gotta love that.

Remember these? The only breakfast food to bold enough to bash Pop-Tarts in their commercials. A coveted childhood delight. The Boston cream kind comes recommended by the Parker Brothers.

Eric and at our improv best on my breakfast birthday morning. No practice, all funk.

Slap your troubles away with the slapchop. This is a parody of a parody. I couldn’t quite suppress my giggles here.

The real video in all its glory: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWRyj5cHIQA

This is our makeshift blindfold to make the trip to Carrabbas very exciting. I kept it on until we actually sat down at our table. The fun was a ‘flowin.

Eric then took me to see Pixar’s UP at University Mall. It was a great movie. The number of theatre we saw it in makes for an interesting sign. I think some theatre worker is getting kickbacks from Dr Pepper Snapple Group.

It’s about 9pm and time for me to get blindfolded again and walk around until I reach the point of suprise. It was a good one and I truly was not expecting it. Funny BYU phenominon: people cleaning up as the party starts.

There were 3 special musical performances dedicated to my honor. This one was an excllent live perormance of Claire de Lune. It was so inspirational Eric and I had to enlighten the audience with interpretive dance.

Later people asked me to break some dance. Thoroughly disturbed was such dance, I assure you.

¿A piñata? Booya! Thanks, Perfect Parker Party Planners!

Musical performance # 2. Yes, this is my friend Scott. Yes, he is an engineering major. Yes, he is rapping so fresh I almost fell over. All original, all from a refined connoisseur of art, music, and ballroom dance. That’s love, folks.

Truth be told.